To surrender to love, you will need to pay attention to any of your own emotions, moods, or thoughts that might lead you to act in less than loving ways. You may need to surrender pride, a sense of self-importance, or the need to have your way, to feel superior to, or to have power over others. You will want to let go of those emotions that make you feel less than, inferior, or doubtful of your worth. You will want to train yourself to think about others in positive ways, even if you feel they have hurt you. You will want to bring about harmonious conditions through your speech, actions, and thoughts.
Discover any reactions to others that may contain even the slightest desire to hurt them. Watch your moods and feelings so you can still be loving to others even when you are experiencing negative emotions yourself. Surrender to love, and respond to those around you with kindness. Recall several times when you have done this, and how good you felt about yourself afterward.
When you feel others have hurt you, you may be tempted to hurt them in return. At first you may want others to feel the pain you feel when they have attacked, criticized, not valued, rejected, misunderstood, or disappointed you. When you feel hurt by others you may want to react with anger, withdraw your love, or retaliate in some way.
What If It Seems Someone Is Trying to Hurt You?
If it seems that someone is trying to hurt you, start by acknowledging and feeling your pain. Do not force yourself to feel and act in loving ways until you have transformed your pain. Lift the emotions you are feeling from your solar plexus center into your heart center so you can feel the serenity of love. Think of times you have responded with love even when hurting others felt justified based on their treatment of you.
Acknowledge yourself every time you choose to respond with love even when others act in unloving ways. In addition, forgive yourself for those times when you could not or did not want to act lovingly.
Connecting With Your Soul
Once you connect with your soul you can feel your soul's compassion. You will understand that some people do not know how to be kind or considerate. They are not really reacting to you; they are reacting to their own fears and to their past. People sometimes say or do hurtful things because they do not feel good about themselves. Your soul never takes offense; it understands that whatever others do that seems unloving is a reflection of who they are, not who you are.
In the last few weeks, have you, in even the slightest way, had the desire to hurt the other person? Why did you feel this way? Were you in a bad mood or in the grip of strong emotions? Or were you picking up the other person's intense emotions? Did you think the other person was trying to insult or hurt you? Pay attention to the things that trigger unloving reactions in you.
Stop Before You React
Stop before you react in a hurtful way. Take time to love and honor your feelings. Do not try to talk yourself out of unloving feelings. Love your feelings, listen to them, feel them, and then lift them into your heart to be transformed into love.
Take time away from the relationship, or create physical distance, until you can respond with love. It is better to be apart for a while, while you transform your feelings, than to be together and act in unloving ways. Wait to respond until you can do so in a way that honors both of you.
"I Now Choose Peace and Love"
If you are trying to stay calm and loving, yet find yourself matching people's bad moods and acting in hurtful ways, do not feel weak, think you are a victim, or blame the other person for "giving" you bad energy. Forgive yourself for not yet being enlightened! Lift solar plexus energy into your heart center and feel the serenity of your soul's love. Think of times when you have stayed centered and balanced around other people's negative energy. Affirm that you have the power to choose how you want to feel.
If people around you are in the grip of strong emotions, soul link, and sense your soul and their soul. Before you speak or act, you might say something to yourself such as, "I now choose peace and love". Keep lifting solar plexus energy into your heart center to surrender any urge to react in an unloving way. It takes great self-awareness and continual attention to be consistently loving and erase all desire to hurt. Not hurting others is one of the greatest challenges and a most important step to take to awaken your heart centers.
Transform Anger with Soul Love
To surrender to love you will need to release anger. Anger can be one of the most challenging of all emotions to transform. It is the "fight" part of the fight/flight response. Fear is the "flight" part.
Anger is the root of many separative emotions such as irritation, feeling superior or righteous, self-pity, and even depression, which is anger turned inward toward the self. Almost everyone feels some degree of anger many times a day. This may be self-anger, anger at society, anger at people who oppose what you believe in, or anger at friends and loved ones. Think of your feelings today. When did you choose to feel anger, if at all?
Anger is a force, an energy that can move you away from those things you are angry at. Sometimes anger can be beneficial, such as when it motivates you to leave a situation that is harmful to you. As you evolve, you will no longer need strong emotions to propel you into action. You will act from the calm, peaceful wisdom of your soul.
Reacting out of anger takes away your true power. It is only when you speak or act from the serene, expansive, and loving perspective of your soul that you feel good about your actions and words. When you act with soul love, you experience true power -- the power of love, the most powerful energy in the universe.
Stop and Acknowledge Your Anger
Start recognizing when you feel angry. Sometimes you choose to feel angry when you are around the anger of others. When you feel anger that is out of proportion to the situation, you may be reacting to past pain that you have not yet resolved. You may feel anger because you are out of harmony with the universe or feel bad about yourself or your life. Or, you may feel angry because you think others have not been treating you the way you should be treated.
Stop and acknowledge your anger the moment it arises. Do not blame others for causing it. If you are feeling angry, join with your soul to increase your desire to love. Lift solar plexus energy into your heart center. Relax into the serenity of soul love. Let energy flow up into your head center and expand into the oneness of love. Experience your soul's wisdom, compassion, and understanding.
You can feel the serenity of love even when you are around people who are angry, attacking, defensive, and functioning from their unevolved solar plexus center. Choose how you want to feel no matter what kind of emotions, thoughts, or energy you are around.
Do you have any hidden or not-so-hidden anger? Lift solar plexus energy into your heart center. Soul link and radiate your soul's accepting, transparent, and unconditional love. You might say, "I surrender any anger I have toward you. I take responsibility for making my own life work."
Choose not to be a victim. Instead, affirm that you have the power to create any life you want. Recall a time when you transformed your anger and acted from a calm, dear, and loving state. Reflect on how good you felt about yourself. Transforming anger is a powerful step to take that will create positive changes in your relationships with yourself and others.
Release Irritation & Offer Love Instead
Irritation is a strong emotion that can be experienced by people whose solar plexus center is awakening and whose sensitivity to the energies about them is increasing. Many people experience irritation as their sensitivity to the disharmonious energies around them increases, before they have learned to join with their soul and lift solar plexus reactions into their heart center.
As you may have experienced when you were around people who were irritable, irritation can be contagious. You offer others a great gift when you transform any irritation you are feeling into love. A joyful, cheerful attitude is a loving contribution to the well-being of others.
If you are feeling irritation, or are around people who are expressing irritation, blend with your soul and lift solar plexus energy into your heart center until you can feel the serenity of soul love. Forgive yourself for responding to the energies around you in a less-than-centered way. Radiate a transparent love as you soul link. Forgive other people for being irritable. Remain calm and play with radiating various soul love qualities, such as a magnetic, accepting, and amplifying love, around them.
Honor Yourself by Setting Boundaries
Respect your time, your needs, and your spiritual path. If you find yourself unable to set boundaries, to tell where you end and others begin, if you feel other people's feelings as if they are your own, lift solar plexus energy into your heart center. Remember the times when you did set boundaries and people still loved you.
You can stay in calm, serene states of love, no matter what emotional states other people are in, by radiating soul love. From this state of love you will do what is good for yourself and your soul, rather than what other people want you to do. Whether other people change or respond to your love is not important. Every time you offer love, you awaken your heart centers.
Decide whether or not you want to continue to be around people who do not honor you. Believe that all your relationships can be loving, supporting, and enriching.
This article was excerpted with permission from
"Soul Love" by Sanaya Roman, ©1997,
published by H J Kramer, Inc.
Soul Love: Awakening Your Heart Centers
by Sanaya Roman.
Soul Love teaches you how to link with your soul and open your heart in order to feel more love, self-love, and love for others. You will learn to use love - the most powerful energy in the universe - to lift, purify, expand, harmonize, balance, and transform all the energies around you. Making soul contact and awakening your heart centers can be one of the most important and transformative steps on your path of spiritual awakening that you will ever take.
About The Author
Sanaya has been channeling Orin, a timeless being of light, for over 15 years. She has worked with Orin to write Living With Joy, Personal Power Through Awareness, and Spiritual Growth. She and Orin have coauthored the books Creating Money and Opening to Channel with Duane Packer who channels DaBen. Sanaya currently conducts seminars with Duane in awakening the light body, and in spiritual growth. Visit their website at www.orindaben.com.