InnerSelf

by Daphne Rose Kingma. Our beliefs about love no longer match up with what's going on in the world, and they are contradicted when our relationships end. I call these out-of-date notions the obsolete mythologies of love.

by Isha Judd. Meet somebody, fall in love, get married. That’s how it goes, right? Then what? We hear of astronomical divorce rates, couple therapy, and extramarital affairs, but we also hear of the picture-perfect fifty-year happy marriages. What is this need to get married, and why do we think it will fulfill us?

by Barry Vissell. When it comes to living together or marrying, both partners must equally choose, or the relationship is being built on a faulty foundation. The “chooser” is somewhat like a parent, while the chosen one becomes more of a child. The person not making the choice has...

by Ernest Quansah.

Most people go into relationships out of love. The problem is that, later on, they find out they have selected the wrong person and now must break-up. There is a better way to ensure that you are selecting the right person for you so that your love relationship succeeds and does not become just another statistic.

by Joyce and Barry Vissell.

In a court of law, if both partners of a married couple claim they have irreconcilable differences, the court will grant them a legal divorce... Joyce and I, having worked with thousands of couples over the last 37 years, challenge that there is no such thing as irreconcilable differences. We have seen that...

by Celeste B. Longacre.

Fairy tales are wonderful stories for young children. They give us a sense of place and a great deal of hopefulness for the future. Of course, someday my Prince (or Princess) will come and we will live happily ever after... What does happily ever after mean? Contrary to popular belief and, perhaps, our...

Are we relationship material? Boy this sounds like a loaded question. A question that I have been spending quality time asking myself. I see adults, ranging in all ages, with life experiences that have either brought them into relationships or out of relationships. I see some that are quite content being...

Trust is the foundation of love. Yet how do you build it? With monotonous regularity you hear your friends and colleagues say, "You can't trust anyone anymore." Almost every popular magazine you open has an article about how couples cheat on each other. Yes, a majority of married men and women do...

It is natural for relationships to have an ebb and flow, to grow more or less intimate as circumstances shift. Relationships need care and nurturing, and often it's hard to know what to do. You have probably been searching for reasons why your relationship isn't as warm, loving, and compassionate as you'd like. We will help guide you to find the real reasons why your relationship might not be all you desire — and you may be surprised at what you find.

by Kelly Johnson, M.D. Can any two people create and maintain a great relationship? You may not think so, because in your search for love, you've only met with failure and disappointment. You may have come to expect that any love relationship you have will end up being quite painful...

We were both only twenty-one when we began our relationship, and quite immature. Each of us was looking for someone to provide us with emotional security, since neither of us had developed any real sense of wholeness within ourselves. We had very distorted pictures of what love is. We weren't equipped to participate in a healthy relationship; neither of us had seen examples of them in our families

It is time for us to rethink our beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors about the use we make of our sexual energies. How and with whom we use these energies are among the most important decisions we shall ever make in life. The consequences are immediate for the entire gamut of life lived...

by  Doreen Virtue, Ph.D.

It is rare that just one partner in a relationship is unhappy. When one partner suffers, the other one usually is affected as well. Yet, unless the partners compare notes and seek solutions, they may each feel alone in their unhappiness.

by Gabriel Horn.

They stood together, a man and a woman, holding hands within the circle of wild oaks and sabal palms. A warm wind swept the sweet spring air around them into a gentle, loving force that tantalized their senses. He told her that he would honor and respect her, and that he would support her on this journey.

Many years ago when I practiced as a lawyer, I spent a large portion of time advising divorce petitioners. And, as I did so, I applied my psychological and astrological training to research the reasons why each marriage had gone off the rails. I found there were a number of recurring themes -- types of conduct which are virtually guaranteed to drive the spouse to drink, desperation, and divorce.

Why is marriage so tough at times? Why do some lifelong relationships click, while others just tick away like a time bomb? And how can you prevent a marriage from going bad -- or rescue one that already has?

I have asked people to list all of their important possessions, from top to bottom, and they all invariably come up with similar lists. Houses, cars, furniture, stocks... and other material goods usually rank highly. Then I tell them that they have overlooked the number one valuable commodity in their life...

The familiar Golden Rule -- Do unto others as you would have them do unto you -- has analogues throughout the world's cultures. A better version of the Golden Rule for couples -- and one of the secrets to loving in flow -- is to do unto your partner as your partner would like, not as you would like or as you wish he or she would like.