ARCHETYPE:
The Tyrant
This
article is part of a series on the dysfunctional
archetypes. When
it comes to people, there are only about a dozen
life stories in the whole world, and each
archetype has its own obvious characteristics.
Of course, everyone has individual traits and an
individual story, but the generalizations are
true, as everyone is inside the one global mind,
and that global mind is segmented into clear
demarcations.
In
looking at people, you'll soon see what aspects
you should avoid, and you'll know how to help
them if they ask you. You'll develop a new
compassion for all the unnecessary struggle
people go through. You can see that most
struggle is easily fixed.
The
Tyrant
Tyrants
are angry, usually because they're scared. More
often than not, they're tyrants because they
were abused as kids. Sometimes they're angry
because they feel they haven't gotten half the
breaks in life they think they should have had.
If their image is wrapped up in material things,
or if it's trussed in a power trip, they will be
threatened by anything that vaguely hints of a
"reality check". The tyrant lashes out
when cornered by the truth. Inflicting pain on
others helps them feel less disempowered, less
terrified by their monsters and dark memories.
They
desperately need to be loved, yet they live in
an emotional desert because no one likes them;
most are scared of them. That reinforces the
tyrant's warped idea that the world is against
them, and that making life hard for others is a
way of experiencing power. Sometimes, if the
tyrant is really powerful, they pull lesser,
would-be tyrants around them, and a gang or a
fascist outfit is born.
The
wounded child becomes the military or political
tyrant, or the domineering father who lives
vicariously through his children's performance
in life to make up for his own failures. He
won't think anything is ever good enough.
Sometimes the tyrant is an emotionally
tyrannical mother, or another female who's out
of control and dominates and terrorizes through
emotion and theatrics.
The
tyrant, more often than not, is a nobody. Often
he's a failure and a coward, and he needs others
to march forward for him to fill the gap of his
inadequacy. He places unreasonable demands on
others, partly to dominate and control them, and
partly in the vain attempt to bolster himself up
to assist with his fears and insecurities.
Meanwhile, he causes trouble, dominating,
manipulating, and controlling those around him
with negative emotion, violence, and threats.
Tyrants are terrified of death.
If
you don't have a Ph.D. in psychology and lots of
time to spare, stay away from tyrants. If you
have to deal with tyrants, remember this: Even
though they're desperately unhappy, they become
arrogant and dogmatic through the exercise of
their tyranny. You will rarely get a tyrant to
see reason. They live in their own rabid empire.
Tyrants like and expect abuse. "Plank on
head" is the only language they understand.
Don't negotiate, don't accommodate, and don't
try to please them. The more you try to do for
them, the more it affirms their power of
manipulation. It's sad to say, but you should
never cut the suckers any slack. It's bound to
backfire.
A
tyrant is like the schoolyard bully who won't
back off until he gets a punch on the nose. So
the way to serve and help the tyrant is to be
firm and not allow him to get away with it. He
won't change until he experiences a big setback.
The power that tyrants exert is too
intoxicating, as it medicates their fear. So
don't try to change them, and don't bother
trying to keep them happy. It doesn't help. Just
whack 'em in the head with the biggest
psychological, contractual, emotional, or
financial plank you've got. And when and if they
get up, then whack ' em one more time for good
measure. They expect it, and they'll respect you
and cause less trouble. Over the years, I've
tried love, kindness, and reason with this sort,
but it rarely works unless some event has
softened them up and made them open to change.
If you can't just walk away, which of course is
the best course of action, then engage them as
little as possible and keep up with "plank
on head" 'til they quit.
Tyrants
may sometimes be hard to spot, since they often
cloud their tyranny by feigning reasonableness.
But you can spot them from their expression, as
it's hard to hide the anger and violence they
project. Usually the tyrant takes his darkness
to the grave. But then again, sometimes the
Great Goodness that loves us and gives as all a
second chance comes along. Some special event is
created for the tyrant, usually a painful one,
and he suddenly sees the error of his ways and
changes. Sometimes after he undergoes a
spiritual or religious conversion, he uses his
power to campaign for love and goodness, and
that's a wonderful thing.
 This
article was excerpted from the book, Sixth
Sense by Stuart Wilde. Reprinted with
permission of the publisher, Hay House, P.O. Box
5100, Carlsbad, CA 92018. 800-654-5126. Visit
their website at www.hayhouse.com.
For
more info, or to order this book.
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