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InnerSelf.com
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  • Personal Empowerment
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Finding Your Perfect Partner: Two Key Ingredients

Joyce Vissell By Joyce Vissell
Joyce Vissell

Finding Your Perfect Partner: 2 Key IngredientsSharing your life with a loving partner is very rewarding and meaningful. Since we work with couples, we often ask them how they met. Often they will respond that they met online. Typically, they are somewhat embarrassed when they reveal this, thinking that it should have been a more natural and romantic way of meeting. But...

We Tell These Lies When Looking For Love Online

Melissa De Witte-Stanford Universit By Melissa De Witte-Stanford Universit
Melissa De Witte-Stanford Universit

We Tell These Lies When Looking For Love Online
Lying about availability is a common deception online dating users tell potential partners, according to a new paper. “Until now, it has been relatively unclear how often mobile daters use deception in their messages before they meet the other person,” says Markowitz.

How Same-Sex Couples Divide Housework

Leah Ruppanner, University of Melbourne and Claudia Geist, University of Utah By Leah Ruppanner, University of Melbourne and Claudia Geist, University of Utah
Leah Ruppanner, University of Melbourne and Claudia Geist, University of Utah

How Same-Sex Couples Divide Housework
Housework is often understood as a gendered negotiation based on the traditional roles of homemaker (feminine) and breadwinner (masculine). While gender norms have shifted dramatically in the past few decades, theories of housework are still stuck on this 1950s model.

Does Age Difference Matter In Relationships?

Gery Karantzas, Deakin University By Gery Karantzas, Deakin University
Gery Karantzas, Deakin University

Does Age Difference Matter In Relationships?
Romantic couples with a large age gap often raise eyebrows. Studies have found partners with more than a ten-year gap in age experience social disapproval.

The Unseen Impact Of Domestic Violence

Paul van Donkelaar, University of British Columbia By Paul van Donkelaar, University of British Columbia
Paul van Donkelaar, University of British Columbia

The Unseen Impact Of Domestic Violence
The statistics are terrifying: In Canada, one woman is killed every week by her partner; globally, one third of women will suffer violence at the hands of someone they love in their lifetime. But what if survivors like Susan are also dealing with the effects of a traumatic brain injury along with the fear and trauma of finally having escaped a long-term abusive relationship?

What Meeting Your Spouse Online Has In Common With Arranged Marriage

Amitrajeet A. Batabyal, Rochester Institute of Technology By Amitrajeet A. Batabyal, Rochester Institute of Technology
Amitrajeet A. Batabyal, Rochester Institute of Technology

What Meeting Your Spouse Online Has In Common With Arranged Marriage
Most Americans who get married today believe they are choosing their own partners after falling in love with them. Arranged marriages, which remain common in some parts of the world, are a rarity here.

Why It's So Hard For Women To Leave Abusive Relationships

Daniel G. Saunders, University of Michigan By Daniel G. Saunders, University of Michigan
Daniel G. Saunders, University of Michigan

Why It's So Hard For Women To Leave Abusive Relationships
In a widely read blog post, Jennifer Willoughby wrote this phrase after each of the many reasons she gave for enduring what she described as her abusive marriage to former White House aide Rob Porter: “And so I stayed.”

Why People Have Affairs, And How To Deal With Them

Gery Karantzas, Deakin University By Gery Karantzas, Deakin University
Gery Karantzas, Deakin University

Why People Have Affairs, And How To Deal With Them
Infidelity highlights the potential fragility of our closest and most important of relationships. But despite the blunt belief infidelity is the result of immoral and over-sexed individuals wanting their cake and eating it too, the reality is far more nuanced.

Who's Your Ideal Mate? Your First Love May Have Something To Do With It

Gonzalo R. Quintana Zunino, Concordia University By Gonzalo R. Quintana Zunino, Concordia University
Gonzalo R. Quintana Zunino, Concordia University

Who's Your Ideal Mate? Your First Love May Have Something To Do With It
Your first sexual partner may have more to tell you about your spouse or current lover than you may think. Although this may sound surprising to you, studies have shown early experiences play a role in who we choose as a sexual partner.

15 Questions To Determine If Your Relationship Is Hall Of Fame Or A Strikeout

Gary W. Lewandowski Jr., Monmouth University By Gary W. Lewandowski Jr., Monmouth University
Gary W. Lewandowski Jr., Monmouth University

15 Questions To Determine If Your Relationship Is Hall Of Fame Or A Strikeout
Your most important decision may be figuring out your best romantic partner. Relationships matter – a lot. They have implications for your health, your reactions to stress and even how you look at the world. But how can you determine if your current romantic partner is the best of the best for you?

You Are My Valentine: Loving the One You're With

David W. McMillan, Ph.D. By David W. McMillan, Ph.D.
David W. McMillan, Ph.D.

Are You My Valentine? Loving the one you're with
There can be plenty of tension associated with Valentine's Day. One cold, dreary February 14th, I am at the grocery store at 5 p.m. In the parking lot I can see men getting out of their cars and scurrying into the store. Inside at the express lane checkout counter are five men standing in line, each holding a dozen roses...

Tips for Creating Awesome Relationships and Great Valentine Gifts that Don't Cost a Cent

Jude Bijou, M.A., M.F.T. By Jude Bijou, M.A., M.F.T.
Jude Bijou, M.A., M.F.T.

Tips for Creating Awesome Relationships and Great Valentine Gifts that Don't Cost a Cent

To create a truly lovely Valentine's month and build more joy, love, and peace in your life, I offer you ten tips for building and sustaining good personal and intimate relationships. This article full of numbers is followed by eight Valentine gifts that don't cost any money and blatantly show your love.

4 Ways To Be More Vulnerable With A Woman

Barry Vissell By Barry Vissell
Barry Vissell

4 Ways To Be More Vulnerable With A WomanTo be vulnerable with a woman is to allow yourself to be seen and known in your entirety, not just your powerful, independent, secure, loving and capable self. To be vulnerable is to show her your fear, pain, shame, and need for love.

Why We All Want The Same Things In A Partner

Gery Karantzas, Deakin University By Gery Karantzas, Deakin University
Gery Karantzas, Deakin University

Why We All Want The Same Things In A Partner

Characteristics merely reflect gross exaggerations of important evolutionary qualities that we actually want in a long-term partner.

Why People Cheat on Their Partners

Esther Perel By Esther Perel
Esther Perel

Why People Cheat on Their PartnersWe all know what infidelity is, but a universal definition is difficult to carve out—especially in the digital age. Is watching porn cheating, or is it only cheating if the person on the other side of the screen is live?

Why Most Of Us Lean To The Right When We Kiss

Michael J. Proulx, University of Bath; et al. By Michael J. Proulx, University of Bath; et al.
Michael J. Proulx, University of Bath; et al.

Why Most Of Us Lean To The Right When We KissSimple behavioural tests have now allowed us to see how this organisation is revealed through biases in how we see and interact with the world – and each other – often without us being aware of it.

When Sex Roles Get Reversed, Some Females Develop A Penis

Paco Garcia-Gonzalez, Ramon & Cajal Researcher, Spanish Scientific Research Council CSIC By Paco Garcia-Gonzalez, Ramon & Cajal Researcher, Spanish Scientific Research Council CSIC
Paco Garcia-Gonzalez, Ramon & Cajal Researcher, Spanish Scientific Research Council CSIC

A male African jacana bird mounts a female, but who takes the lead in caring for the young?. In many species, the males develop elaborated sexual traits to attract females and dissuade potential rival males through competition.

Why Young Men Have Sex They Don’t Actually Want

James Devitt-NYU By James Devitt-NYU
James Devitt-NYU

Why Young Men Have Sex They Don’t Actually WantHeterosexual men have unwanted sex with women for two reasons, interviews with 39 college men suggest: in order to conform to gender expectations and to avoid uncomfortable interactions.

Is Sexual Harassment Part Of Growing Up

Fiona Vera-Gray, Durham University By Fiona Vera-Gray, Durham University
Fiona Vera-Gray, Durham University

Is Sexual Harassment Part Of Growing UpAllegations about sexual harassment in Hollywood, British politics and various other sectors have exposed a reality already familiar to most women.

Fewer Are Getting Married. Is Marriage Becoming Obsolete?

Emily Costello, The Conversation By Emily Costello, The Conversation
Emily Costello, The Conversation

Fewer Are Getting Married. Is Marriage Becoming Obsolete?There’s no doubt: Fewer people are making a commitment to marriage. Barely “more than half of adults in the U.S. say they’re living with a spouse. It is the lowest share on record, and down from 70 percent in 1967.”

AI Can Predict Whether Your Relationship Will Last Based On How You Speak To Your Partner

Ian McLoughlin, University of Kent By Ian McLoughlin, University of Kent
Ian McLoughlin, University of Kent

AI Can Predict Whether Your Relationship Will Last Based On How You Speak To Your PartnerAny child (or spouse) who has been scolded for their tone of voice – such as shouting or being sarcastic – knows that the way you speak to someone can be just as important as the words that you use. 

How Sharing Parenting Duties Could Be Key To Marital Bliss

Leah Ruppanner, University of Melbourne; Melissa Milkie and Scott Schieman, University of Toronto By Leah Ruppanner, University of Melbourne; Melissa Milkie and Scott Schieman, University of Toronto
Leah Ruppanner, University of Melbourne; Melissa Milkie and Scott Schieman, University of Toronto

sharing parental duties 10 5The quality of women’s relationships with their partner is diminished if they view their parenting division as unfair or want to spend more time working, our new study of employed parents in Canada has found.

Words of Wisdom That Changed My Perception

Vecchi Talarico By Vecchi Talarico
Vecchi Talarico

Words of Wisdom That Changed My PerceptionThe list was one I never thought I would make. I stared at the book titles I had jotted down for reference; each of them looked at divorce from a different angle. I felt I was at the end of my rope as I drifted farther and farther away from any hope of restoring the unity we...

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