You've Been This Way Before

You've Been This Way Before

Some people got to sing
Some people got to sigh
Some people never see the light
Until the day they die

But I've been released

And I've been regained
And I've been this way before
And I'm sure to be this way again
                                    -- Neil Diamond

Yes, we've all been this way before. Whatever path we're on, whatever attitude we've taken, we can probably recognize that we've experienced it before... with other partners, other bosses, other co-workers, other friends, other family members. We seem to repeat the same attitudes and the same experiences with others in our lives, new or old, until we "get it".

What is this "it" we need to get? Well, it varies of course with each person because our life lessons and experiences vary. Yet, I believe there is a common goal for all of us. For most of us, it usually has to do with learning to let go of the past... of the past anger, resentment, fear, sorrow, and even of the past joys and happiness. and then replacing all that with acceptance and with love. Another way of saying that is to live in the now which really means not basing our thoughts, words, and actions on things in the past, but only basing them on the present moment.

We often think that we only need to let go of the dark moments... yet sometimes hanging on to the good moments can also keep us from moving forward. Some may remember perhaps the time when their children were young and all was so wonderful. Or when their relationship was still in the honeymoon stage. Their children/partner loved them and they knew that they were loved. Yet by not being willing to let go of that time, of the people they were then, this keeps us from recognizing the new and improved version of the person in our midst... even when that new (and improved) person is us.

I'm Sure To Be This Way Again

I was just listening to a Neil Diamond song where he wrote: I've been this way before And I'm sure to be this way again. And this is a scenario for all of our lives. Each situation that we experience, if we stop and reflect, resembles perhaps another encounter before... and we will keep having the same challenge until we "get it". Yes, until we understand what we have to learn from "it".

And even then, our self-discovery has been compared to peeling an onion. There are many layers to deal with. Or perhaps our experience is more like a spiral. As we deal with one situation, we move up to the next level where we deal with the same challenge from another perspective, another loop in the spiral. It's somewhat like school. We start at kindergarten and progress up through every grade until we graduate. And then some of us go on to college, graduate school or other education.

Yet, the bottom line for all of us is Love. Yes, love for ourselves, love for others, and even love for the challenge we are encountering at the moment. Each challenge gives us a chance to shine, to step out of the old angers and fears, of the old resentments, or the "not good enough" syndromes (whether we think we're the one that's not good enough, or we think that of someone else). Each situation allows us to choose a different reaction... a different action and to make that choice from love.

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Rewriting the Script

Yes, we can be sure that we will  "be this way again"  if only to realize that we no longer need to behave that way and then choose another path. Instead of remembering the negative in every person we meet and in every encounter, we now see the light, the joy, the possibilities. Instead of constantly expecting things to be the way they've always been, we allow for people to have changed just as we have changed, as we have grown. Instead of bemoaning what could have been, we look at what is, and then make a choice as to what path and direction we want to take.

Nothing about our future is set in stone. Our movie is still being written, and the cast can be changed as we go along. Just as a TV series will drop certain actors and add new ones throughout the series, we also get to drop actors in our lives and add new ones. We also get to rewrite the script until it is "just right" or at least a great improvement on the previous year's script. And then we can always change it again the next day, the next year, and the next whenever.

We've all been this way before... perhaps in a time we don't even remember. Yet it is important to realize that we have the inner resources to meet all challenges. When we stop to tune-in to what our heart desires, we get guided to the next step... to the next experience... to the next loving moment that we can create.

Article Inspiration

I've Been This Way Before (song) from the album: Love at the Greek, recorded live at the Greek Theater by Neil Diamond.I've Been This Way Before (song)
from the album: Love at the Greek, recorded live at the Greek Theater
by Neil Diamond.

Neil Diamond returns to the site of his Hot August Night triumph with this 1977 double album, now on one CD.

Click here for more info and/or to order this CD.

About The Author

Marie T. Russell is the founder of InnerSelf Magazine (founded 1985). She also produced and hosted a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from 1992-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal growth, and well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our own inner source of joy and creativity.

Creative Commons 3.0: This article is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 License. Attribute the author: Marie T. Russell, Link back to the article: This article originally appeared on


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