Do you ever feel that you are totally alone and unsupported in difficult times in your life? The feeling of isolation can be very painful. I have a story to remind us that we are never really alone and there is a beautiful support that we may not even be aware of.
Spiritual Help: Being Supported in Difficult Times
Our daughter Rami got married to River on June 27 in our garden, with a background resplendent with colorful flowers. This is a story about them, but mostly it is about spiritual help that is supporting us in difficult times, even when we may not know it is there.
Rami met River seven years ago. Their relationship seemed to lead up to the point of marriage, when suddenly after four years the relationship ended. Rami and River did not see each other after they separated. I do not know what River was experiencing because I didn’t see him, but I do know Rami was going through a very difficult time.
My mother Louise, who was 89 at the time and living right next door to us, positively adored River and always felt they should get married. We tried to tell her they were no longer together, but she had a difficult time accepting this.
Preparing for the Journey with Angelic Assistance
During this time of Rami and River’s separation my mother started to go through her dying process. Our family took care of her at home for the year leading up to her death and this was a totally transforming experience for all five of us. In the beginning of this year my mom would mention to one of us that she still thought River would make the best husband for Rami. We would patiently tell her that the relationship was over. Finally she seemed to get it and did not talk about it again.
In the last two weeks of my mother’s life she was having beautiful experiences and visions of the place to which she was going. She was both peaceful and excited about her dying journey.
One week before she died she was particularly clear and was able to see both me and the angels that were there to help her in her transition. I was asking her different questions about what she was seeing and she was describing the indescribable. At one point I couldn’t resist asking, “Mom could you please ask your angels if they know who Rami is going to marry?” At the time I didn’t really think I would get an answer, but figured it was worth the try.
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Ask and Ye Shall Receive: Asking for Guidance
She looked at me for a moment and then smiled, “I want to know the answer to that question as well. I’ll have to close my eyes for this one. I’ll be right back.” She closed her eyes and then asked in a quiet voice, “Dear angels, who is my granddaughter Rami going to marry? I’d like to know before I die.”
There was a long period of silence and I figured my mom had fallen asleep. She finally opened her eyes and said, “I guess my angels don’t know everything. They said Rami would marry River, and they are already working on it. ”
I took my mom’s hand. “Oh mom, you know that they are no longer a couple. Rami is trying to move on from that relationship.”
She again closed her eyes and was silent for a long time. I passed the time looking at her vast collection of photo albums and just watched her sleeping. Startling me, she again opened her eyes and said in a commanding voice, “Joyce, you are to invite River to my memorial service! I want him to be there.”
My mother died one week later in a beautiful and peaceful way. Keeping her wish, after checking with Rami, I invited River to her memorial service. My mom and her angels apparently did their magic. River and Rami connected again at her memorial service which was one year after their separation. They have not been apart since. I believe the happiest person present at their wedding was my mom smiling from her new home, perhaps saying, “I told you so.”
In Your Darkest Hour... Something New and Wonderful is Coming Your Way
Is this just a nice story about Rami and River, my mom and her angels? I am hoping that you can see it as a story about you as well. Can you imagine in some of your darkest hours of life when you feel totally alone and unsupported, that there is unseen help already working towards your higher good and growth.
There are times when life can be very confusing and doesn’t seem to be going your way at all. But perhaps during those darker times a beautiful growth is coming into your life that ushers in something new and wonderful. Even though we may not see or hear this help, there is a loving presence working on something beautiful for us. Now I know for sure, angels are never wrong.
This article was written by Joyce Vissell the co-author of:
A Mother’s Final Gift: How One Woman’s Courageous Dying Transformed Her Family -- by Joyce and Barry Vissell.
In writing this book, Joyce and Barry Vissell, and their children, mentor us through an experience that many of us were afraid to even think about. Joyce's mother, Louise, looked at death as her greatest adventure. The title of this book is indeed A Mother s Final Gift but, in truth, this story is an exceptional gift to every person who will read it.
About the Author(s)
Joyce & Barry Vissell, a nurse/therapist and psychiatrist couple since 1964, are counselors near Santa Cruz, CA. They are widely regarded as among the world's top experts on conscious relationship and personal growth. They are the authors of The Shared Heart, Models of Love, Risk To Be Healed, The Heart’s Wisdom, Meant To Be, and A Mother’s Final Gift.
Here are a few opportunities to bring more love and growth into your life, at the following events led by Barry and Joyce Vissell: Jul 21-26, 2019 — Shared Heart Summer Retreat at Breitenbush Hot Springs, OR; Sep 24-30, 2019 — Assisi Retreat, Italy; and Jun 7-14, 2020 — Shared Heart Alaska Cruise For further information on counseling sessions by phone or in person, their books, recordings or their schedule of talks and workshops. Visit their web site at SharedHeart.org.
Two Recent Books (2018) by the Vissells:
To Really Love a Woman
by Barry and Joyce Vissell.
How does a woman really need to be loved? How can her partner help to bring out her deepest passion, her sensuality, her creativity, her dreams, her joy, and at the same time allow her to feel safe, accepted and appreciated? This book gives tools to the readers to more deeply honor their partners. Although these writings refer mostly to heterosexual women and men, there is a wealth of information for LGBTQ. Our focus, after all, is how to deeply love another person, whether it be a man or a woman.
To Really Love a Man
by Joyce and Barry Vissell.
How does a man really need to be loved? How can his partner help to bring out his sensitivity, his emotions, his strength, his fire, and at the same time allow him to feel respected, secure, and acknowledged? This book gives tools to the readers to more deeply honor their partners. Although these writings refer mostly to heterosexual women and men, there is a wealth of information for LGBTQ. Our focus, after all, is how to deeply love another person, whether it be a man or a woman.