In general, the moment a person who has had a difficult childhood revisits his past, he begins to hold a grudge against his parents or other family members and to identify with the role of the victim. He fights the negative and ends up going round and round in circles in this role.
It is important to understand, however, that in order to truly heal a wound, we have to get out of the victim role. Even though people who go for therapy are generally encouraged to do this — because this notion is now widely accepted in psychology and psychotherapy — it is a method, which in itself, cannot go very far. Why? Because we have yet to understand that a person does not get hurt by chance.
Working with the Information We Receive in Dreams
As we grow spiritually and the more we work with the information we receive in dreams, we accept the idea that our parents represent parts of our soul. What you suffered because of your father, you yourself subjected your own children to in other lives and that’s why you were born into this family with such a difficult father. You had to face your karma and do the required inner work in order never to repeat this pattern.
When we have been victimized and we do not resolve things, what happens is that, at some point, we ourselves become the victimizer. We adopt the same behavioral patterns as those who have hurt us. Any psychologist or psychiatrist would validate this statement.
Therefore, if a person who was beaten as a child does not revisit his memories to make peace with them, he could, in turn, in a moment of anger or despair, beat his own children. This is because violence has been directly inscribed in his soul and body; it has been inscribed directly into his cellular memories.
If his father or mother — or another person close to him — assaulted or harmed him as a child, this has bred very contradictory feelings within him: love and the need to be loved is mixed with revenge, the need to control, and many other feelings. The person becomes so confused in this sea of contradictory emotions that he begins to identify love with violent behavior. Even if he adheres to beautiful principles of non-violence and tolerance, if he has not cleansed the memories that are at the core of his suffering, he will have a natural tendency to repeat the patterns of violence.
Unresolved Emotions & Dynamics Can Follow Us Throughout Our Lives
Resentment can remain quietly hidden somewhere in our conscience and all it would take is a situation of survival for revenge to resurface. Resentment can also appear under the guise of erroneous concepts or negative feelings toward certain people or situations. It could pull away from the framework of the father or mother and could, for example, transpose itself onto all men, all women, or any other category of people without conscious awareness of this fact. These dynamics can follow us from one life to the next.
Get The Latest From InnerSelf
The concept of reincarnation is one that many people find difficult to accept. Reincarnation is the first key, the first opening to deeply understand all the symbols and all sorts of situations we experience in our dreams and nightmares. Already, simply by saying, “If this was done to me, it’s because I did the same thing myself,” we stop believing that our difficult time is caused by others. By directing our thought process in this manner, we become part of this evolution.
Life Is Like A Dream... with Symbols & Symbolic Language
We waste so much energy looking for happiness on the outside! It is within us. The keys lie within us. The first consists in understanding why suffering exists, where it comes from, and understanding that it is generated by our own experimentations.
One day, with the concept that our life is like a dream, we have such an understanding of life gravitating around us that we no longer view anything as dramatic. It is as if evil had lost its foul-smelling or aggressive dimension. We understand things on a different level of consciousness, like God that sees good and evil as educational forces that everyone must experiment with.
With symbolic language, life can be understood like a dream and we can analyze any concrete situation just as if it were a dream and, through it, find a true lesson for our soul. That’s what is called The Law of Resonance. What is good and bad with people and situations in our daily life resonates as in dreams where we are shown symbols and parts of ourselves. The Law of Resonance allows us to accelerate our individual evolution.
The Law of Resonance: We Are Linked To Others & Exchange Energy
The day you are no longer bothered by the behavior of others is the day when you will be able to truly love, understand, listen and be close to them. They can be right up close to you, telling you in detail what they are going through and you’ll be able to listen to them without tiring. Whenever you feel your energy has been sapped, analyze the person with whom you were talking and say to yourself, “The difficulty he’s had in his life, all that he talked to me about, I have all this within me. It has resonated with some of my memories and makes me feel heavy and lacking in energy.”
One day, we will have acquired such a capacity for loving another person that we will be able to give him a great sense of well-being simply by listening. We all do this at whatever level our resonance allows us to.
We are all both a teacher and a student. There is always someone to help; everyone is involved in helping and supporting others. We all help and support ourselves and others. This is the true meaning of altruism. Whether or not we like it or are aware of it, we are constantly linked to others and we exchange energy with them exactly like in dreams.
Reprinted with permission. ©2011. All Rights Reserved.
Published by UCM Publishing, http://www.ucm.ca/
This article was adapted with permission from the book:
How To Interpret Dreams & Signs
DISCOVER THE SECRET CODE OF DREAMS & SIGNS... "I had to understand my fears, my joys, my weaknesses that were appearing in form of symbols, both in my dreams and in my daily life. I found one of the first keys the day I told myself: If everything I see and know can appear in my dreams, then physical and metaphysical worlds involve the same symbols. There was a code. Now, I know the code..." Kaya returned to the public forum and began sharing the code, and his research and experience in the form of books and lectures.
About the Author
KAYA is now considered one of the greatest specialists of our time in the domain of understanding and teaching how to interpret dreams & signs. He is a bestselling author, international speaker around the world as well as a singer and a songwriter who inspires us with songs that make our mind and soul think and feel our inner life deeply. Visit his website at www.kayadreams.com.
Kaya's new CD (MP3 version), Born Under the Star of Change, is a collection of songs that reveal a mystical journey, and articulate personal and universal spiritual experiences.