Rearview mirror. Photo credit: Antonio Olmedo (CC BY-SA 2.0)
I've discovered a new technique! Actually, I can't really say I discovered it... it came to me in a dream. In this dream, I was sitting in a classroom and the teacher presented this technique:
When something comes up in your life, when something is taking place that is not in complete harmony, ask yourself one simple question. "Where is this coming from?"
The idea is to keep repeating the question and take it step by step until you get to the "bottom line". The bottom line is a basic belief you hold which is instrumental in creating your reactions (and your reality). Whatever your beliefs are (and you can use this technique with everything, i.e., food addictions, anger, fears, habits, etc.), once you have discovered the bottom line, then make up the most positive statement you can to reverse the scale and clear the old pattern!
An example? O.K. The other day I was going through some physical discomfort and found that I went around looking for sympathy. I was feeling the old "poor me" syndrome. When I noticed this attitude in myself, I asked "Where is this feeling coming from?" The first answer was "It's coming from a need for attention".
O.K., that was the first layer. So I took it one step further, and I asked "Where is this need for attention coming from?" What I got, or what I understood, was that I believed that when people give me attention (or sympathy), it means they love me.
Now this was getting interesting. So I asked again, "Where is that coming from?" Promptly the clarity came. A belief in the lack of love in my life, thus the need for proof. That felt like the cause of this whole attitude, thus was the "bottom line" belief. I believed (and this was rooted in my childhood) that I was not loved. Now when I look at this from my present adult perspective, of course I know for a fact that I am, and always have been, loved. Yet the belief that I formed in childhood was never eradicated! Thus it still was in my unconscious and popped up when it had the opportunity.
So Where To Take It From There?
Since the inner child or subconscious still had that belief, the first step was to start telling myself over and over again, "I AM LOVED! There is more than enough love for me and for everyone."
You can write your affirmations, say them silently or out loud to yourself, shout them out, tell them to your friends. I chose to say this affirmation silently to myself. Repetition is the key!
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Whatever reprogramming affirmation you choose, say it often and say it with feeling! Write it on your mirror, tape it up on the fridge, put it wherever you are more apt to see it. If your bottom line is "I'm not good enough", affirm "I AM GOOD ENOUGH". If one of your old beliefs is "I'm a failure", repeat to yourself "I AM A SUCCESS. I AM A WONDERFUL PERSON."
Where Is This Coming From?
I find that as I ask myself "Where is this coming from", it gets easier and easier to find my way clear to the "bottom line" belief. Our subconscious programs from childhood need to be uprooted if they are not bringing us happiness. Yes! We do deserve to be happy! Yes, we are good enough!
The same situation can bring up many emotions and old patterns, thus various "bottom lines" for each situation. For example, in the midst of an experience of intense and unrelenting physical pain, I found a thought popping up in my mind. Now this thought I recognized from previous encounters with pain. What was it? I was thinking "I wish I would die" -- obviously not an "enlightened" belief -- nevertheless, it was there in my mind.
So I asked myself "Where is this coming from?" And after a few steps, the bottom line that was revealed was the belief that life is painful. Now that belief may have been formed in the birth canal, yet the belief was still present decades later. It had never been canceled! So, I now affirm "LIFE IS JOYOUS! LIFE IS PLEASANT! LIFE IS SWEET!"
Tracking Down Unsupportive Beliefs
The idea of this process is to use it to track down unsupportive beliefs. You'll find them behind every unpleasant encounter or mood. One thing to be careful of. When you ask "Where is this coming from?" -- make sure your answers deal with you! Don't give as an answer, "It's because of Jack's behavior!"
If the answer that you get lays the "blame" on someone else, then ask yourself what emotion or feeling that brings up in you and then ask where that feeling is coming from. The important thing is to focus on YOU. It is your beliefs that affect your attitude and your reality!
If you believed that everyone in your life was supportive of you and loved you, then, whatever "Jack" did would not push your buttons. You would be secure in the knowledge that you are loved and worthy of love. Remember to look within yourself for the causes. If you throw the ball (blame) to someone else, you lose the power to change your life.
When you take the time to reprogram your subconscious with new, positive, and empowering bottom lines, you become much happier with the outcome.
What is the new bottom line? We deserve to be happy and fulfilled! We are loved! We are loving and lovable beings with many gifts to share with the world.
How to Love Yourself Cards: A Deck of 64 Affirmations
by Louise L. Hay.
Each of the 64 affirmation cards in this deck has a message for you: You are safe in the Universe, and all Life loves and supports you. Every thought you think is creating your future, so choose positive thoughts and words about yourself and about Life. Choose to be at peace. Choose to see clearly with the eyes of love. Come from the loving space of your heart, and know that love opens all doors.
Info/Order this card deck.
About The Author
Marie T. Russell is the founder of InnerSelf Magazine (founded 1985). She also produced and hosted a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from 1992-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal growth, and well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our own inner source of joy and creativity.
Creative Commons 3.0: This article is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 License. Attribute the author: Marie T. Russell, InnerSelf.com. Link back to the article: This article originally appeared on InnerSelf.com