Breaking
Free
by Marie T. Russell
 We
all seem to have one habit or another from
which we'd like to break free. For some it's
smoking, for others eating compulsively, for
other talking too much, or talking too little,
for some working too much,
for others... the list goes on and on. Yet
between all of these there is a common link.
Many of us feel helpless when faced with our
habits. We feel controlled by our needs, our
cravings, our habits, our addictions. How do
get out of the trap? How do we break free?
While
there is surely no one pat answer, there is a
common thread. What makes us unable to break
free? Somehow we feel we can't, that this
"thing" is stronger than us, that it
is ingrained in our cells, our genetics, our
programming. While that may be true, who or
what is this habit stronger than? Are
"we" the habit? Or does it simply
"live" somewhere? Where do our
habits or cravings live? In our cells, in our
genetics, in our memory, in our habits, in our
brain? Wherever it is, it is somewhere in our
body, our physical body.
It
is said that the memory of everything that has
ever happened to us is stored in our cells.
The memory of every time you were hurt (physically or
emotionally) is stored physically in a cell in
your body. Every time someone told you
"you couldn't do it" is stored in
your cells, every time someone told you that
"you weren't good enough" is stored
in your body. All of it. No wonder it's
difficult to get out of these patterns,
habits, addictions. Not only do we have the
habitual action (opening the fridge door,
reaching for the pack of cigarettes,
responding with anger without thinking,
working late, etc.),
but we also have the cells of our body
responding from habit or old programming. The
question is: Are we our body? Who runs the
show? -- the body or us?
I
like to think of my body as somewhat like my car,
something outside of me or separate from me. I
decide when I'll put gas into it, what type of
gas it gets, when it gets washed, when it gets
an oil change, etc. You get the picture.
Another way to see the relationship between
your body and you is that your body is like a
child, or a pet. With a child or a pet, you
decide what food and when it gets to eat. You
decide what toys it is allowed to have, where
it is allowed to go, what it is allowed to do,
etc. In the same way, you are in charge (or
you can be) of your body. You decide what it
gets to eat, where it gets to go, etc..
The
problem may lie in that we have so totally
identified with our body that
we don't realize that we have "ruling
power" over it. We get to decide, not
"it".
We have somehow let our body take over, like a
child who has thrown so many tantrums that the
parents have given up and now let it have its own
way. We have given up and let our body make
decisions for us. Yet it is not capable of
making "enlightened" decisions. It
is so tangled up in cellular memories,
genetics, programming, that it can't make a
decision which is for our highest good. It
decides based on cravings, old unsatisfied
needs and wants (my mother never let me have
sweets), and old programming (she always
ruins her dinner by snacking all afternoon).
I
am not my body! I reside in this body. I have
a lease on it. I do not even have ownership.
After this body dies (yes it will do that at
some point), it's done for. But "we"
are not. Whatever this "we" is.
Whether it is a unique spiritual entity, or a
group consciousness, or soul group... whatever
the actual form of "we", we live on.
Too many of us have had experiences of life
after death, of people communicating with us
after death, of astral travel, etc., for us to
still doubt whether "our life" is
separate from the life of our body. They are
two distinct things. Our car may conk out and
die on the side of the highway, but we get out
and start walking... and eventually we get a
new car. In the same way, our body may die,
but we get out and keep going... somewhere,
somehow.
Maybe
the way out of addictions and old programming
is to disassociate ourselves from our body. I
am not my body! I am spirit, I am soul, I am a
spiritual being residing in this body. Once we
regain that perspective, we can start dealing
with our body as a rebellious child...
sometimes giving it treats and rewards, but
definitely not letting it run the show. It is
not in charge. It does not have the wisdom and
knowledge to make the "proper"
decisions. We do! We have learned what is best
for us, for both our body and our spirit, and
we have the ability to make
"enlightened" decisions.
Take
back control of your body. It's just a
cantankerous child -- and you're letting it run
your life? Maybe some clarification of roles
needs to take place. You can break free once
you realize who you are. You are not your
body, so how can you be controlled by its
needs and demands and fears? We can break
free. It may take some effort to take back the
reins, but we can remind ourselves
(continuously) "who's the boss" and
live accordingly. You've got the power! You
are the power!
 RECOMMENDED
BOOK:
Get Unstuck! The Simple Guide to Restart Your Life
by John Seeley.
Info/Order
book
 About The Author
Marie
T. Russell is the founder of InnerSelf Magazine (founded 1985). She also
produced and hosted a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from
1992-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal growth, and
well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our own
inner source of joy and creativity.
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