by Swami Beyondananda
What if I told you you could do nothing all day and become fabulously wealthy
in the process? If you say "No way!" I say, "Absolutely
right." Because now, thanks to my new network marketing company, NoWay, you
can make a fortune selling boxes of Nothing.
I want you to think about all those people who told you that nothing could
make you rich and successful. Well, here is your chance to prove them right!
Yes, if you feel you have been working for nothing all these years, now it is
time to have Nothing to work for you.
I tell you, this is a business opportunity whose time has come, because no
matter what your problem is, Nothing will help. For example, Nothing has been
proven to cure every disease imaginable. That's right. Studies show that
placebos alone are effective in about 20% of cases ? and what better placebo
than Nothing? And you can forget about pesky product liability lawsuits. We
promise Nothing ? and we deliver. How many companies can make that claim?
Imagine how refreshing it will be for your friends who have been inundated
with multilevel marketing opportunities. You can truthfully tell them you have
Nothing to sell ? and then sell it to them! Yes, in a world filled with
products that are really nothing disguised as something, you can sell something
disguised as nothing.
Think of all those pessimystics out there who insist that nothing can help
the starving multitudes, nothing can alleviate poverty, nothing can revive our
neighborless 'hoods. I say, let's prove them right and prove them wrong at the
same time.
Imagine armies of homeless folks or unemployed young men selling boxes of
Nothing door-to-door. "They told me nothing could get me off the
streets," they might say, "and I am hoping they are right. Will you
help?"
Now why, you might ask, would anyone be interested in buying Nothing? Well,
for one thing, most of us already have everything. In fact, we have so much of
everything that we can't appreciate nothing.
After all, God made the entire Universe from nothing. And the same holds true
of our own creations. Every painting begins with an empty canvas, every book
with a blank page, every symphony with silence to be filled. As Harry Cohen Baba
used to say, "Listen, if you don't know nothing, you don't know
nothing."
Of course, being a FUNdamentalist, I couldn't resist putting some funny jokes
about nothing on the box. This is a perfect product for those diagnosed with
humorrhoids and who insist, "Nothing makes me laugh." So not only will
you be striking a blow for the invisible nothing in a world cluttered with
visible somethings, but you will be raising the laugh force on the planet ?
and creating a mannafestival of the first order.
Imagine millions and millions of people all around the globe being fed and
prospered by Nothing. Now that's what I call manifesting manna!
