Don't Worry, Be Happy
by Richard Carlson
When Bobby McFerrin first sang his classic song, "Don't Worry, Be
Happy," I felt as if he were singing my thoughts to the world. I've
spent most of my professional career studying, learning, teaching,
lecturing, and writing about happiness and related topics. I've always
known that, despite resistance and objections from the more serious
segment of society, people have an innate capacity for happiness. And
when we are happy, we not only enjoy our lives more than when we are
not, but we are far more competent, productive, and creative. Without
the internal distractions of anger, depression, frustration, and
especially worry, our relationships flourish, stress is diminished, new
doors are opened, and our lives run smoothly.
About five years ago I began to realize that the same essential idea
applies to success and money. I had been a reasonably successful
business man in several of my own ventures, yet there seemed to be a
small but important missing link that was keeping me from realizing my
professional and financial goals. There was a part of me that had
always been a little unnecessarily cautious, a part of me that worried
too much.
I began to look carefully at the people I respected and admired,
people who had "made it" in their given fields. I looked at writers,
athletes, businessmen and women, entertainers, speakers, therapists,
entrepreneurs, corporate executives, and other professionals. And what
I learned amazed me! While there were certainly all types of
people — women, men, conservative, liberal, left-brained, right-brained,
street smart, Harvard educated, and so on — who had made it really big,
there was a thread of consistency that ran through virtually everyone:
They didn't worry about money!
Interestingly enough, the lack of worry
preceded the success, and was not a by-product of it. An inner,
unshakable confidence permeated their entire existence. They were
creative problem solvers, great negotiators, and clever creators. They
had an ability to see the big picture, they knew the formulas for
success. And the best part of it all was that, in almost all cases, it
appeared that the nonworriers, the successful people I was studying,
truly loved their lives and the way they spent their time. They had fun!
I began to apply some of the teachings I had been working with in
the field of happiness and self-esteem to my own business life. My life
changed, almost instantly. Whereas before I had been quite frightened
to speak publicly, I began to love it. The less I worried about the
outcome, the better I became at speaking. This translated into more
speaking engagements, more book sales, and far more clients for my
business. It was as if all of a sudden my time was in greater demand.
I found that the same relationship between less fear and more
success existed in my personal investments. As I worried less, I began
to expand my knowledge about different kinds of investments and
options. Never once did I (or will I) jump into an investment blindly,
as some might assume a person would do if he didn't worry; instead, I
simply opened my mind to new possibilities. Instead of approaching my
financial life with fear, I was beginning to approach it with wisdom. I
took more appropriate risks and asked better questions. While my
profits grew, I was also learning how to cut my losses — again without
too much worry.
So much in my life began to change, especially the way I related to
people. Failure didn't concern me as much, criticism was handled in
stride, rejection seemed like information to guide me in a new
direction instead of something to immobilize me, hurdles seemed less
like obstacles and more like opportunities, and everything, all of it,
seemed like more fun. I had more energy, worked a lot smarter,
surrounded myself with great people and terrific teachers, and watched
my creativity and confidence soar. I tried things I never would have
dreamed of attempting. Not everything turned to gold, but some of it
did. And that which didn't, always turned out to be a great learning
experience.
More than all of this, however, the area of life that changed the
most was my ability to make money. And miraculously, I was also
learning how to help others better. I had always wanted to be of
service, and to a certain extent I had been. Yet up to that point I had
felt that I could and wanted to do more. But again, fear was getting in
the way. As I applied the strategies of worry reduction to my business
life, an interesting thing began to happen. I no longer allowed fear to
dictate how much I felt I could give. I gave away more, and it always
came back to me. So I'd give more. And more would come back. Whether I
was giving money, time, ideas, energy, or simply my love, it always
came back to help me, too.
In The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success , Deepak Chopra
discusses this "law of giving." He describes giving and receiving as
two sides of the same coin. The more you give, the more you get back.
He's right! But you don't give because you want something. You give
because giving is its own reward. It's fun. As you learn to worry less,
you'll also learn to trust your heart as much or more than your head.
While you will be doing better in different aspects of your life, you'll also be doing more
for other people. You'll be far less preoccupied with success; yet
ironically, you'll become more successful, much more. You'll trust that
everything will be okay. And it will.
Mother Teresa reminds us, "We cannot do great things on this earth.
We can only do small things with great love." I have certainly found
this to be true. However, I have also discovered, as have thousands of
others, that as we worry less we are more willing to do those
small things with great love. Rather than postponing the giving of our
time, energy, ideas, or money, we learn to give freely, from the heart.
I've had clients who, for years, wanted to do important volunteer work
but were too frightened to do so. They usually felt that they "couldn't
afford" the time off from work. They were too frightened that they
might lose their job or fall behind. Fear always created some "good"
reason that prevented them from reaching out. Yet, invariably, when
they banished their fear and took the step, everything worked out for
the best. The actions of their heart led to greater personal
fulfillment, the helping of others, new friends, even new personal
contacts or ideas that turned their own financial lives around. When
the circle of fear is broken, we are all the beneficiaries.
If you've read any of my other books, you know that I believe
strongly in the potential of people. I believe that we are resilient
creatures; that we have the capacity for great joy, compassion, and
wisdom; that we don't have to "sweat the small stuff". I'm delighted to
add to this list my absolute certainty of the correlation between less
worry and more success. As you reduce and eventually remove the worry
and fear from your life, you will begin to see new options, ways of
doing things, and ways of relating to life that were invisible before.
You'll have more fun and be able to help more people. You will live the
life of your dreams.
If you've read Marsha Sinetar's Do What You Love, the Money Will Follow, Stephen Covey's The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Wayne Dyer's Real Magic, Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen's The Aladdin Factor,
or practically any of the other recent wonderful books on success,
you'll find in them elements of the "less worry is better" ideal. I believe it is
one of the most important factors of success. Until you eliminate worry and fear, it
is very difficult to implement any strategy for success.
I cannot adequately put into words how wonderful life can be when
worry is diminished. For me, abandoning worry has opened a world of
possibilities for both my inner and outer worlds. Life without worry
has opened new doors and created freedom that, until a few years ago, I
never thought were possible. So, "don't worry" — I know this can happen
for you, too.
This article was excerpted from:
 Don't Worry, Make Money
by Richard Carlson, Ph.D.
Reprinted with permission of the publisher, Hyperion. ©1997, www.hyperionbooks.com
Info/Order this book.
About the Author
RICHARD
CARLSON is the bestselling author of
Don't Sweat the Small Stuff at Work;
Don't Sweat the Small Stuff for Teens; and
Don't Sweat the Small Stuff for Men,
among
many other titles. He lectures around the country and internationally.
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