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Within a few minutes of our meeting at a Chinese New Year celebration, I had the attractive banker in the expensive suit pegged as a type-A personality -- intelligent, focused, aggressive ... a typical woman warrior.

"Many men come in and out of my life," she confided during our consultation, "but I quickly get bored with them. However, I'm in my 30s, and I want to marry and settle down. Give me one quick tip on how I can achieve this."

As she spoke, she showed me around her bachelorette bedroom, and I noticed the location of the doorway.

"Tell you what," I said, "I'll give you two. Your bedroom door in your marriage area represents the men in your life coming in and out. Keep your bedroom door closed all the time, except when you're using it, and tie two red ribbons on the inside doorknob."

Two years later, I bumped into the banker again.

"I've been meaning to contact you all this time!" she said. "Within a month of doing what you suggested, I met the man I married, and we have a baby girl!"

***

Love is the stuff of dreams, drama, and dread, as well as agony and ecstasy. And yet who among us can live without it? Scientific research has shown that both plants and people perish without attention and care. The pages that follow will concentrate on providing tips on attracting many different kinds of relationships -- not just the romantic or passionate kinds. After all, we experience the love of our families long before that of friends, lovers, mates, or partners. Love blossoms from the seeds of harmony, kindness, communication, commitment, respect, affection, and growth.

Feng shui must be practiced in concert with your spiritual, emotional, physical, and intellectual development. Just like the legs on a table, all of these aspects of your well-being contribute to your being centered or grounded. And without your active involvement in creating your own luck, your efforts and intentions will be weakened and less successful.

Five Components of Destiny

In Chinese thought, feng shui is only one of the five components that make up our destinies. The other four are fate, luck, charity, and education.

Fate represents all the circumstances of our birth: where, when, which family, birth order, ethnicity, socioeconomic circumstances, and so on. Luck consists of three different kinds: man-made, pure, and heaven. Then comes feng shui, the ancient Chinese environment system of aligning human energies with that of nature and the universe. Fourth is charity and philanthropy: doing good deeds and creating good karma through one's thoughts and actions. Last is education and self-development, as we should always be stretching our minds, bodies, and spirits to higher levels.

How to Use Feng Shui to Attract Love

Notice that good relationships can be achieved by stimulating several areas in each room, not just the romance areas. After all, you wouldn't want to undermine your efforts by loading up the SW (Compass) or right rear (Black Sect) zones to the exclusion of other aspects. I mainly focus on the SW, NW, E, NW, and W areas. But, above all else, keep balance and moderation in mind.

Keep in mind both the generative and destructive relationships of the elements so that what you do supports and doesn't destroy your feng shui efforts. For example, knowing that in the Compass School, SW is the prime direction for activating romance, love, and marriage, you should then avoid using any wood here because wood destroys the element of earth (SW.)

As you search for romance, keep in mind that feng shui won't do the job all by itself. Before you spend time, money, and energy on looking for that ideal romantic partner, take a good look at yourself. Begin by making (or remaking) yourself into the kind of person that you'd like to have a relationship with -- only then can you develop into a person someone else would love, for feng shui is as much about changing the person inside as it is about changing their environment outside.

Remember to practice feng shui with a pure heart and strong intentions. Gladly use this wonderful ancient knowledge to your advantage and personal enrichment, but don't practice it to harm anyone. This means that it's acceptable to strengthen your position in someone else's life with feng shui, but to use it to eliminate your competition for that person's affections creates bad karma and will surely backfire.

Three Golden Rules of the Feng Shui Lady

1. If it isn't broken, don't fix it. Ask yourself if you're happy, healthy, and prosperous: If the answers are yes, yes, and yes, then only fine-tune or make minor changes in your life. You don't want to make major overhauls and upset the blessings and good things you already have.

2. If you don't see it, it isn't there. Feng shui is a mental, practical, metaphysical, and spiritual process that uses a range of strategies, including assessment, addition, camouflage, removal, deflection, transformation, and protection.

3. Everything is fixable. Feng shui offers hope, empowerment, and a marvelous opportunity for taking charge and being proactive to change your life.

Gen Ghui for a Single Woman's Bedroom

1. Do decorate with peach in your bedroom if you're a single woman, for this is the color that attracts a good man.
   
   
2. Don't design your bedroom so that it's overly feminine if you want to attract a man into your life.
   
   
3. Do add images of men and/or couples to your walls if you're a single woman.
   
   
4. Don't illuminate the NW corner of any room, as this may attract untrustworthy men into your life.
   
   
5. Do decorate with images of the Chinese phoenix in your bedroom if you're a single woman. This is one of the traditional symbols for marriage.
   
   
6. Do use pink or peach-colored candles in the SW area of your bedroom if you're a single woman. The fire element will give your romance and relationship area a boost.

Feng Shui for a Couple's Bedroom

1. Do be mindful that your bedroom is the most intimate place for couples, including their thoughts and dreams.
   
   
2. Do teach your children and their friends to respect the privacy of your bedroom and to knock and wait for permission to enter.
   
   
3. Don't allow your children to enter your bedroom without your permission.
   
   

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This article is excerpted from:

FENG SHUI DOs & TABOOs for LOVE
by Angi Ma Wong.

Reprinted with permission of the publisher, Hay House Inc. http://www.hayhouse.com

Info/Order this book.

About the Author

Angi Ma Wong, one of America's most popular and prolific feng shui practitioner/authors, is an award-winning businesswoman and bestselling author. She has been featured in Time, USA Today, on CBS Sunday Morning, and Regis & Kelly and has been a guest on Oprah. Angi Ma Wong is also the author of Feng Shui: Arranging Your Home to Change Your Life, Feng Shui Garden Design Kit, and Feng Shui Dos & Taboos.

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