Did You Stop & Smell the Flowers?

by Marie T. Russell

One hears a lot these days about nurturing...nurturing one's self, nurturing loved ones, children, etc. Nurturing means to feed, or nourish. Nurturing applies to giving love and caring attention. I have been advised many times in my life to pay more attention to myself, and to nurture myself.

Not feeling too clear at one time about what that meant (since I had never learned how to nurture myself), I asked my Inner Self for clarification. Here is the message that came through.

"To nurture yourself means to give yourself the things you perceive you 'need' as well as so-called 'luxuries'; to allow yourself to sit back and do nothing even though you know that there are a multitude of things waiting for you to do; taking the time to soak in a hot tub, even though a shower is much faster and more 'efficient'; cuddling up to a plush teddy bear and allowing yourself to feel like a child again.

Nurturing yourself is taking the time to have a massage, to go for a leisurely stroll on the beach, to lay on the grass enjoying the feelings and sounds of nature. It means eating balanced wholesome meals, making sure your body is getting exercise, and enough rest. 

Nurturing yourself means making yourself a very important person in your life, one that you love and that you want to be happy. Nurturing yourself is being good to yourself, not holding a whip of efficiency or whatever over your head.

Nurturing yourself is respecting your needs for solitude, for love, for companionship, for rightful work, for creativity, for rest. Nurturing yourself is loving yourself for who you are now (a God seed), knowing that you are still developing into who you really are (a realized Being)."

As I write this, I feel an ache in my back and I realize that once again today, I pushed my body to its limits. I had my engine revving since 7:30 this morning, and kept on working all day, stopping only long enough to eat a fruit and later to have some water. As I look at the time, I see that it is now 8:30 p.m. I ask myself, 'When could I have taken the time to nurture myself?'

The answer comes clearly. I could have stopped on the way home to admire the full moon that I saw rising on the horizon. I could have stopped at the florist shop that I passed on the way to work in the morning and bought myself some flowers. I could have taken the time to eat a revitalizing salad. I could have taken a few minutes off from working to go stretch out on the grass and feel the nurturing of Mother Earth. I could have taken the time to stand up and stretch those tight neck and shoulder muscles. I could have...

I realize that these things would take up so little of my 'precious' time, yet would renew me with strength and vigor. Yet I find that I, once again, let myself be caught up in the "doing", and forgot about the "being". I forgot to stop and smell the roses, and instead pressed on towards tomorrow, not really seeing today.

When I stop to think of who we are, and why we are on the planet, it makes sense to me that as children of God we are entitled to enjoying our time here. Our loving father/mother/creator want their children to be joyful, embodying the essence of life. We humans sometimes neglect to give ourselves the opportunity to enjoy being alive — to look up into the sky and dwell on the stars; to walk along the beach and feel the sand between our toes; to take the time to relax and enjoy being.

I know that each sunrise and sunset is unique and that each person I meet and each experience I have is unique. I have often only seen the commitments of yesterday, and the demands of tomorrow, and have missed out on the beauty of today. Well, it is never too late to change, to forgive myself for my absence from life. My life has been taking place and I wasn't there to enjoy it.

Many of us have placed great importance on nurturing our "possessions" — our cars, our stereos, bicycles, our children, our mates, etc. We would do well to nurture our bodies, emotions, and mind as well. We need to remember that our physical and emotional bodies need to be given love and attention to promote health, vitality, and well-being.

So, I'm off to nurture myself... What about you? I'm sure that each and every one of you can come up with things you could do to nurture yourself, and then put at least one into practice each day. Make a list.

About The Author

Marie T. Russell is the publisher of InnerSelf Magazine (first published in 1985 as Mighty Natural Magazine). She produced a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from 1991-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal growth, and well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our inner source of joy and creativity.

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by Barbara Ann Brennan
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